Wednesday, August 27, 2014

DVD Review: Live Nude Girls

I’ve always been amused by signs advertising “Live Nude Girls.” I would love to know the set of circumstances that led to them to thinking the first word was necessary. The film Live Nude Girls sheds no light on this issue. It is about a man who inherits a strip club from his uncle, and… Well, that’s it, really.

Shane (Mike Hatton) and his friend Tommy travel to Los Angeles in a car patterned on K.I.T.T. from the television series Knight Rider. After all, this film takes place in 1985, while that show was still on the air. Tommy is first seen videotaping Shane in the car, as he fancies himself a documentary filmmaker. But as this is a period piece, his video camera doesn’t capture the clearest image.

The strip club is not doing all that well. In an early scene, the MC encourages the few patrons: “Give it up for Sandy. Come on, guys, help her out. She’s supporting a drummer and a crank habit.” There is a wonderfully funny moment when Tommy throws pennies at a stripper. Part of the reason the club is not doing well is Harry, the club’s manager. He is played by Dave Foley (an actor I am always happy to see). When Shane asks about the financial picture, Harry tells him: “Looks a lot like the Titanic, you know, post-iceberg, you know, if everything was also on fire and they were surrounded by exploding sharks and everyone had leukemia and did a lot of blow.” And soon Shane sees where the money is disappearing.

Right when he thinks he has to close the club down, a young blonde named Chloe shows up, and she knows how to work the pole. And suddenly business is booming, just like that. There’s not even a 1980s musical montage to show how business began growing. And actually, for a film that takes place in 1985, there is a surprising lack of great music. I’m shocked that the film doesn’t use some of those wonderful pop songs from 1983 through 1985. Instead, we suffer through a generic instrumental score, which is tedious.

Throughout the film, Tommy interviews club employees and patrons in the making of his documentary. This never really pays off in any way, but there are some funny moments. Like when Tommy asks, “What’s the secret to being a good lover,” and a police officer answers, “For me, just making sure I don’t have the gun in the bed.”

There’s a strip act based on Star Wars, with one girl dressed as Princess Leia (in the long white dress from the first film) and two others dressed in stormtrooper helmets. Soon Leia removes her white dress to reveal the slave outfit from Return Of The Jedi underneath, as you might expect. This is one of my personal favorite scenes. (There is also a reference to Howard The Duck later on.)

There is plenty of nudity, and in particular Mindy Robinson as Amber adds a great deal of appeal to the film. And it’s always great to watch Dave Foley. Most of the laughs are due to his comedic sensibilities. Also, approximately an hour into the film, Andy Dick shows up as Eddie, the owner of a sex toy company, who demonstrates his toys to the employees. This provides for some amusing moments.

But the film has a plodding pace, and is certainly not burdened by anything resembling a plot or character development or believable relationships. Some group comes into the club at one point to perform an act, because they had made a deal a while ago with Shane’s uncle. One of them is Cannonball Calhoun, a man who will eat anything and he is played by Ken Hudson Campbell, another actor I’m always happy to see. But nothing ever comes of this troupe of performers. That story idea is introduced, toyed with for a few minutes, then completely dropped.

And late in the film, suddenly, for reasons known only to the writer, one of the strippers tries to get the club shut down. And there is the cliche of the owner having to raise a certain amount of money in a short time to keep the club going. But who cares? There’s nothing special about this strip club. It’s a strip club. It stays open, it shuts down, it doesn’t matter. And ultimately that’s how we feel about the film as well.

Bonus Feature

The DVD includes approximately five minutes of deleted scenes, including a bit more with Andy Dick and some more with Dave Foley. There is also a little more with that troupe of performers.

Live Nude Girls was directed by Jay Leggett, and was released on DVD on August 26, 2014.

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